Golden Globes 2020

I have been waiting patiently last night to see the Golden Globes and I’ve cast my ballot after a lot of consideration. I really loved “Joker” and the descent into madness it talks about. The thing is I really loved Almodovar’s feature “Pain and Glory” and I sat breathless at the 2h showing of “Parasite” which I thought was really well made and directed. Continue reading “Golden Globes 2020”

The Joker – Return to madness

Went to see The Joker last night and yes, the critics were right. The movie is an absolute masterpiece! The acting gave me shivers throughout and I nearly started crying when he got kicked about by those teenagers at the start of the movie.

It’s a very powerful story about a man’s love for his mother, a slow descent into depression and a desire to be recognised and seen.

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Finally, DC brought a masterpiece out to contend with the likes of Logan. Sure, Wonder Woman was good, Shazam was an unexpected pleasure and even Aquaman didn’t suck (that badly)
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The Goldfinch vs Pilsudski or the tale of the two Borys

I decided to treat myself last night and I went to the movies (Cineworld Unlimited perks means I can see as many as I want, when I want).
Earlier this week I went to see The Kitchen (and was severely disappointed by the story and feminist agenda – even though the 70s backdrop was on point) and I needed something better. Something to make me think, yeah, that was a good movie.

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IT Chapter 2 (Double Bill) – Or how fake blood business is booming!

“Swear to me swear to me that if it isn’t dead you’ll all come back.”

I was terribly excited to see the release of IT Chapter 2. So excited that last night, from 7PM until 1AM (about 5.5h) I sat down in a very comfortable chair watching the IMAX release of IT Chapter 2 preceded by IT Chapter 1.

Seeing these two movies back to back did offer some advantages – as I could see the stuff that they used in the frequent flashbacks in Chapter 2 were there in Chapter 1 and some stuff they added in or changed the dialogue to make it more coherent.

The outcome? Chapter 1 was still amazing, Chapter 2 was funny and freaky and absolutely wild. But not as good as Chapter 1. Just a 9/10 instead of a solid 10.

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Dolor y Gloria – Almodovar returns with this glorious movie

I’m a huge fan of the Spanish director Amodovar and being the movie goer that I am – I went to see a Spanish movie called “Pain and Glory” without realising Almodovar was the one behind it. When his name appeared on the title credits, I was tapping my feet in excitement.

From the opening scenes till the end credits, (2h+ later), I was either laughing or crying or in awe of the masterpiece he’d created. His Magnus Opus if you ask me. And much like Tarantino put a lot of his personal experience into Once upon a time in Hollywood so did Almodovar as we see the life in the Spanish countryside and the pained life of a former movie director who now struggles with bad back and terrible coughing fits.

I felt my hairs rise at the first note of the songs in the movie and it didn’t settle until I went out from the cinema, all starry eyed and feeling good.

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Once upon a time in Hollywood – or how Tarantino got too nostalgic

Let me tell you I love Quentin Tarantino’s movies. I’ve seen all of them – including some of the less popular ones – so I was pretty excited to go see “Once upon a time in Hollywood” with a cool looking trailer and a 3h runtime close to the Avengers & LoTR zones.

With huge A listers like Leonardo DiCaprio, Brad Pitt, and Margot Robbie and former A-listers like Al Pacino and Kurt Russell, the movie also drops names from the past of Hollywood that some people might recognize and some might not.

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The Dead don’t Die or How great actors were squandered in this crap movie

Went to see the much awaited “The Dead don’t Die” movie – which was supposed to be another horror comedy like Shaun of the Dead but it really fell flat.It’s got a great cast including Ben Swolo (Adam Driver), Groundhog Day Man (Bill Murray), The Wise one (Tilda Swinton) and Con Air Specialist (Steve Buscemi).

The pre-movie credits are huge and that’s usually a sign of the director sucking his own d*$k and wanting to be Marvel but without all the cool animations. We’re presented with the soundtrack of the movie, “The Dead Don’t Die” which is repeated ad nauseam through the movie making you want to either strangle the director or the singer.

The dialogue is strained and punctuated by extremely long pauses and lulls and the humour is barely there and not enough to salvage this piece of crap.

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When the days are getting longer due to the world axis changing (caused by Polar fracking), the dead come back alive but not all at once but kinda in waves. First Iggy Pop (which was the only reason I gave this movie a one instead of a zero on imdb) and then more. The zombies are not looking for brains, they are hungry for human guts and will sometimes utter some things they really liked when alive: candy, coffee and wifi.

The dead zombies carrying around well charged phones looking for Bluetooth was odd.. I mean, where did they find the phones? Were they buried with them? No pass-code? charger and electric cable included?

I nearly walked out but I was oddly fascinated with this train track. A delivery guy who gives this over the top nerd “wisdom” pieces…

The world is perfect. Appreciate the details.

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A mortician who is speaking English with such a strong accent that you can’t tell where she’s from (they mention Scotland or Ireland). She’s apparently a black belt and has the ability to slash through zombies like a hot knife through butter.

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She also needed a course in appropriate makeup for dead people

At the end of the movie she gets kidnapped (or chooses to go) with a freaking alien space ship back home. I WAS GASPING.

Who the f&^”k wrote this piece of crap script?

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What really annoyed me though was the constant breaking of the fourth wall and the repetitive nature of the jokes.  First wall break happens when the movie name song was playing in a car. So when they say “It’s the theme song”, you wonder to yourself are they actually talking about the movie? Is this something that will be explained later? Surely they wouldn’t break the 4th wall like that…and then you see the second 4th wall break, where one of the police officers literal states “He knows how the movie ends, because he read the script”, I nearly walked out again.

The repetitive part comes with some of the scenes. I mean, you have two waitresses who were gutted – the first idea that the cops have it’s that zombies done it..

Cliff Robertson: What do you think did this?

Ronnie Peterson: I’m thinking zombies.

Cliff Robertson: What?

Ronnie Peterson: You know, the undead. Ghouls.

and then they all take turns in going inside the diner to look at the bodies and then exclaim the same sentences. I was really annoyed at the end of them.

Was it an animal? Was it a pack of animals?

maxresdefault.jpgThe trailer of this movie honestly belies the state of the actual movie. If you watch the trailer, it attempts to convey a more action oriented approach, with aspects of comedy that are quite synonymous with Zombie movies in recent times. However, the movie itself is nowhere like the trailer attempted to portray it as. Everything in the movie is slow, dull, and seems to just be meandering its way through scenes. Watching it, you really want to like it. You’re thinking to yourself that the build up is going to be worth it. However, the more of it you watch, you will begin to feel as though the movie is not going to change, and it doesn’t. The entire movie is extremely blah from start to finish.

1/10 DNR

Call me by your name end speech from the dad

Coming out as gay is pretty hard to do. Crushing on the guy that’s working with your father is even worse. So I’ve watched the “Call me by your name” movie (2017) to complete my Oscar list from 2017 and I was pretty moved by the talk the dad had with his son at the end of the affair.
I think if most parents could show such acceptance and understanding when their kids are coming out as gay – it would make the world a better place and you would see fewer homeless teenagers.

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