Life regrets of 100+ year olds.

I watched this really nice documentary and I was surprised how clear-minded these elderly people are. A bit frail, their skin looking like parchment paper, their eyes sometimes clouded but their voice is strong.

I think the secret of a long-lived life is being surrounded by people, socialising, shopping, following your desires.

“I have beautiful memories, you know…”

So it got me thinking.

What type of things do people have on their bucket lists?

A good bucket list is balanced. There should be items on the list that are easy to accomplish as you grow from a child to an adult. Such as getting a full-time job and paying your own rent.

  • Climbing mountains
  • Flying
  • Shopping
  • Travel (backpacking through Europe is high on many people’s lists)
  • See the Dead Sea and the Holy Lands
  • Go on a safari
  • Go to Disneyland (Paris is the closest to me)
  • Learn a new skill like skying or Karate
  • Get Married and have children
  • Don’t regret anything you’ve done.
  • Become a millionaire
  • Be independent

“If I failed at making a cake, I called it a pudding.”

And remember that living in warm relationships actually expands your life span

Have a look at https://www.developgoodhabits.com/bucket-list-ideas/ and let me know which ones are your top 10.

 

Lessons learned from BoJack Horseman

I really, really like this show. I binge-watched the whole 4 seasons on Netflix (the second time around) as the first time I tried to watch them I just couldn’t go into it. I was like “Whaaaaat? A show about a horse in a world where cats were agents? Somebody must have been high when they filmed this

But then I saw Wisecrack’s take on Bojack and something clicked. Existential Nihilism. Nothing matters. We are just specks of dust in this world and everything we do is pointless. According to the theory, each individual is an isolated being born into the universe, barred from knowing “why”, yet compelled to invent meaning (wiki)

Except it isn’t.

So here’s what I learned from the show:
Continue reading “Lessons learned from BoJack Horseman”

Pushing Daisies or a show with style

A few years back I got hooked on the story of a pie maker who can bring people back to life just by touching them. The story was called “Pushing Daisies” and it was funny, well written, and discontinued after just two seasons.
The tag line was about this cute, sweet guy who has this unique gift plus is good at cooking (pieees everywhere!)and while he can bring people back to life, the laws of entropy require a death – so if he does not put the person back to sleep within two minutes, somebody else will die instead.
When he finds out that his highschool sweetheart died, he brings her back to life (and kills a guard in the mean time) but now he cannot touch her anymore. How heartbreaking it is to be near someone you love but not be able to do anything to them! They can’t kiss, touch or hug – left to barely gaze at each other with love struck eyes.
They do find a way to be together in the end, but their relationship is kinda doomed as no-one can know she is dead-alive and they cannot touch. It’s sweet to watch them unfold either way and the dialogue is fantastic.

(And I fell in love with Chuck’s wardrobe selection!)

How I spent my magical Gay Weekend

So, I went to the As One in the Park festival in London (gay festival I might add) and I had a hell of a trip there! My period came a day before so I had massive cramps and before we left, my gay friend had a fit in the bathroom that he could not get his hair to look as he wanted. And punched the sink. And made his hand bleed. And he sulked over this like a baby for 2h.
I managed to stain a pair of trousers before we left so I had to change in another one. White jeans. Cause wearing black would be too obvious….
We went with the bus – which was great, I got to read about 10% of the “Dead Zone” by Stephen King by the time we got to London. His mood also improved a lot which means he was in a hurry to get there by the time the festival gates opened. That means we did not have time to queue in the bus station to the female toilet and allow me to change my … ahem… to handle my issue. So we speed walked all the way to the festival. Mid way through, my sandal strap broke and I realized I forgot my sun glasses on the bus. Yey!
I got told off for walking too slow so my mood was slowly plummeting and to make it worse, I felt like a flood started down there. I was thinking “please no, dooooon’t stain!!”
We managed to get to the festival and it was quite empty. I knew that no-one would turn up until later when the music started so we had a walk in the park (I ran for the toilets) and studied the map as to where we would go. All the attractions were booming with music but there were no people there. They were only started to come in. So, we sat on a bench and had breakfast.
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Then on a hay stack and then we started watching people pouring in. Good looking people. Tanned people. Muscular people. Oh My God! All of them were freaking sexy!! Too bad there was not even one straight guy in sight. My poor friend was looking left, right and center and was sighing – “Oh, look at that one, he’s hot. Now I feel fat!” He is nowhere fat but how can I explain that to him when there were these types of guys walking about in shorts?
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We met two people on the hay stack and that proved to be quite good as she was a lesbian and he was gay so we had each someone to talk to. We met them later on in the festival and they introduced us to their friends so we grew in quite a small circle. We got on so well that we even took a few photos I can’t wait to show to my parents! (I actually printed this one off and put it all across the house)
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What else did we do? I had my face painted with a blue butterfly which got a lot of conversations started and managed to destroy my face tan (I was red all over except where the butterfly was – where I was white). Oh, I also tanned half an ankle.
We went to see Rylan, Conor Maynard, Katie B and later on, Rita Ora! They rocked house!! And me and my little ‘un were dancing until we felt we can dance no more.

Man, that was fun! I set up a few tasks for my landlord to complete. He is awfully shy and did not know how to break the ice. I demo-ed a few approaches and got a lot of hugs from (very hot) people but he just felt he would get bitch-slapped if he would walk over to a guy and ask to touch his pecs because they look awesome! (I did and they were really hard-core!)
So we went to the Arena, which was a mass of hot half-naked bodies pressed together, and dared him to go from one end to the other. We both went in. He weaseled his way in like, 10 seconds. I took my time, I danced, touched everywhere and got out at the other end really excited.
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He decided he needed a drink so he got really pissed. We were walking through the park and he was leaning on to me saying really cute things like:
“I think I should turn straight and you could be my girlfriend, but I have no idea how we could have sex. Vaginas scare me.”
I was laughing really hard and set my mind into getting him hooked up with someone before we left. I don’t want to be someone’s second choice because he can’t pull! Oh, there was a short moment when he turned around to talk to me and he was really close so I could actually see his lips really close-up and I had this massive butterfly in my stomach ’cause I thought he would kiss me. He didn’t and I let my libido slide slowly under the surface. I still have a crush on him but I’m trying to suffocate it. No point loving someone who will never be 100% yours. He is massively cute though and I still wanna jump his ass.
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So – the festival came to an end with Rita Ora performing and we decided to leave slowly to get to the bus station for 11PM.
We got there and surprise. We could not board because he booked the tickets for the next day!! So we were stuck in London for one more night. His battery was dying and with the last effort, he called a guy that fancied him and …well, tried to get us both a bed for the night. Unfortunately he was pubbing and suggested he (alone I presume) would come by another time and spend the night. I got some cash out of the ATM and we went to a hotel.
We tried about 5 of them (all closed) until we got lucky and managed to get rooms. We were talking on the road – OMG – what if we had to share a double room? I was really hoping they had no single rooms left but I was out of luck. My bad luck continued with a freezing shower (the boiler would not heat up) and the realization that I was out of female pads…Well, at least the bed was comfy and I slept well. We had a very nice continental breakfast and we managed to get the 8AM bus to Northampton (went through Heathrow) and got back home all knackered by about 12.
The entire weekend was quite costly:

  • – £45 for the event ticket
  • £17 for the bus fare
  • £30 in drinks and t-shirts and face painting
  • £12 to change the bus schedule for morning
  • £5 for London fridge magnets
  • £1 for two post cards
  • £65 for the two rooms

I did pay for the rooms ’cause he cooks for me on a daily basis and it’s my way to reward him.
All in all, it was awesome and I can’t wait to do it again!

Yes, my bra kept popping up. Thank you shitty shirt for not staying closed.
Yes, my bra kept popping up. Thank you shitty shirt for not staying closed.

Spring is coming

A Place to RelaxSpring is around the corner so its time to plant you garden….
Make sure that you include
Plant three rows of peas:
Pea-ce of mind
Pea-ce of heart
Pea-ce of soul
Plant four rows of squash:
Squash gossip
Squash indifference
Squash grumbling
Squash selfishness
Plant four rows of lettuce:
Lettuce be faithful
Lettuce be kind
Lettuce be happy
Lettuce really love one another
No garden should be without turnips:
Turnip for service when needed
Turnip to help one another
Turnip the music and dance
Water freely with patience and
Cultivate with love.
There is much fruit in your garden
Because you reap what you sow.
To conclude our garden
We must have thyme:
Thyme for fun
Thyme for rest
Thyme for ourselves

$20

A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill in a room of 200 people, and asked,

” Who would like this $20 bill ?”

Hands started going up.

He said, ” I am going to give this $20 bill to one of you, but first let me do this….” He proceeded to crumple the $20 up.

He then asked, ” Who still wants it ?”

Still the hands were up in the air.

“Well”… he replied, ” What if I do this?”..and he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. “Now who still wants it?” he asked.

Hands still shot up!

“My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it..because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.” Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt, by the decisions we make, and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you never lose your value ! Dirty…clean…crumpled…or finely creased…you are still priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE. You are special….don’t ever forget it.

Count your blessings…….not your problems.

Facts of life

751. At least 5 people in this world, love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you, in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you, is because they want to be just like you.
4.A smile from you, can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don’t like you.
5.Everynight, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. Without you, someone may not be living.
8. You are special and unique, in your own way.
9. Someone that you don’t know even exists, loves you.
10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
11. When you think the world has turned it’s back on you, take a look, you most likely turned your back on the world.
12. When you think you have no chance at getting what you want, you probably won’t get it, but if you believe in yourself, you probably sooner or later will get it.
13. Always remember complements you received, forget about the rude remarks.
14. Always tell someone how you feel about them, you will feel much better when they know.
15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that their great.

Marbles

A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the basement with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. He was telling whoever he was talking with something about “a thousand marbles.”

I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say. “Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you’re busy with your job. I’m sure they pay you well but it’s a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet.  Too bad you missed your daughter’s dance recital.” He continued, “Let me tell you something Tom, something that has helped me keep a good perspective on my own priorities.” And that’s when he began to  explain his theory of a “thousand marbles.” “You see,I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years. Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900 which  is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime.  Now stick with me Tom, I’m getting to the important part. It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail,” he went on, “and by that  time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred  Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be  seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left  to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every  single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside of a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear.

Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life. There is nothing like watching  your time here on this earth run out to help get your  priorities straight.

Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time. It was nice to meet you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. 75 year Old Man, this is K9NZQ, clear and going QRT,  good morning!” You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that  morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter. Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss.

“C’mon honey, I’m taking you and the kids to breakfast.” “What brought this on?” she asked with a smile. “Oh, nothing special, it’s just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids.  Hey, can we stop at a toy store while we’re out? I need to buy some marbles.”

I love this Doctor

Q: Doctor,  I’ve heard that  cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? 

A: Your  heart is only good for so many  beats, and that’s it…  don’t waste them on exercise.  Everything wears out  eventually.  Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer;  that’s like saying you can extend  the life of your car by driving it faster.        Want to live longer?  Take a  nap.
Q: Should  I cut  down on meat and  eat more fruits and  vegetables? 

A: You  must grasp  logistical efficiencies.  What does a cow eat?   Hay and corn.  And what are these?  Vegetables.  So a steak  is nothing more  than an efficient       mechanism of  delivering vegetables to your  system.   Need grain?   Eat  chicken.   Beef is also a good source  of field grass  (green leafy vegetable).  And a pork chop can  give you  100% of your recommended daily allowance of  vegetable  products.
Q: Should  I reduce my  alcohol intake?  

A:  No,  not at all.  Wine is made from  fruit.  Brandy is  distilled wine,  that means they take the water out of  the fruity bit so you  get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out  of grain.  Bottoms up!
Q: How  can I calculate my body/fat  ratio? 

A: Well,  if you have a body and you have  fat, your ratio is one  to one.  If you have two bodies, your  ratio is two to  one, etc.
Q: What  are some of  the advantages of participating in a regular  exercise  program? 

A: Can’t  think of a single one, sorry.  My  philosophy is: No  Pain…Good!

Q:  Aren’t  fried  foods bad for you?           
A:  YOU’RE  NOT  LISTENING!!! …..  Foods are fried these days in  vegetable oil.  In fact,  they’re permeated in it.  How could  getting more  vegetables be bad for  you?
Q:  Will  sit-ups  help prevent me from getting a little soft  around  the middle?          
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger.  You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
Q:  Is   chocolate bad for me?           
A:  Are you crazy? HELLO   Cocoa  beans ! Another vegetable!!! It’s the best feel-good food around!
Q:  Is   swimming good for your figure? 
A:  If swimming is good for your figure,  explain whales to me.
Q:  Is getting in-shape important for my   lifestyle?           
A:  Hey!  ‘Round’ is  a shape!
Well,   I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may  have had about  food  and diets.
And  remember:

‘Life should  NOT  be a journey to the grave with the intention of  arriving  safely in an attractive and well preserved  body, but rather  to skid in sideways – wine cooler in one  hand – chocolate in  the other – body thoroughly used up,  totally worn out and   screaming ‘WOO  HOO, What a  Ride!!!’  And For  those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final  word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the  truth after all those conflicting nutritional  studies.  

  1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
  2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
  3. The Chinese  drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
  4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
  5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of  sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION

Eat and drink what you like. Speaking  English is apparently what kills you.