Posts By: theFerkel

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Police Quotes

These are actual police officer quotes collected from numerous people stopped for moving traffic violations. “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.” “The handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch out after you wear them awhile.” “So, you don’t know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write… Read more »

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Types of Pussy

1. Expensive Pussy Most pussy falls into this definition. Expensive Pussy can be recognized by the following – fur coats, $500 dresses, spandex, bright colored shorts, and shirts with greek letters on them. 98% of good pussy falls into this category. Advantages: If you can afford it, it will be great. Disadvantages: Many, mostly in… Read more »

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Women Driving

Nothing worse than some women driving! Now – I would be a bitch if I did not say it also happened to me! In 2009 I got stuck with my red Golf in the middle of a mud field. Here I was thinking that a golf is the same as a 4×4… It isn’t! It… Read more »

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Office Terms for the busy people

BLAMESTORMING – Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who is responsible. SEAGULL MANAGER – A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything and then leaves. SALMON DAY – The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream, only to get… Read more »

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Top 10 Worst Pick Up Lines

Ten worst pick up lines: 1. How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized? 2. Excuse me is that a space suit you’re wearing, because your ass is out of this world. 3. If I follow you home, will you keep me? 4. The voices in my head say you should go out… Read more »