Olympus has fallen! White House Down! London has fallen too but with less of a bang!

Movie night again and oh wow! Was “London has fallen” bad! I had an inkling that the movie would be bad when the credits were still rolling well after the action started. I hoped it would be better when I saw “Gerard Butler” in the main role. I faltered when I saw it again in the writers and producers role. This is what Adam Sandler does – an Adam Sandler movie…

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The movie has been done before – disgruntled terrorist has his family killed by a drone and organizes an attack during a public burial of the English prime-minister showing a true mastermind nature as he manages to take everything into account and perform a flawless attack – but he didn’t consider Gerald Butler playing a secret agent defending a pretty useless American president who didn’t know how to use a gun….

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In the true nature of action movies, the Americans survive, the other nations are under-organized and under-prepared to respond to a terror attack and a lot of violence ensues.

OK, where does the movie suck the most? Let me see

  1. The clichees.

I have seen this movie before. I think with the exact same actors too! And the same scenes. The director had no creativity!

2. The bad CGI

I was actually laughing out loud during some of the badly done (and sometimes overdone CGI). I thought I was going to get expelled from the cinema room like I did when I laughed at Robert Patterson’s patchy chest hair during Twilight. I think the graphics guy was told – just put a lot of black smoke everywhere! And make all the landmarks fall down in the posters but not really in the movie… (The tower of London was not attacked). Also, surprisingly the Shard escaped too even though it’s as iconic to London as the Statue of Liberty is for New York. Probably because it’s not purely British? Or respect for their own? Or not enough funds?

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The last mission that proves to be fatal

How many movies have you seen where someone gets shot on his last mission? Die hard was one of the few first ones I can remember. But this one clichee has been used and re-used to infinity and beyond!

The empty streets of London

Never in any of the chases does the action get stuck in traffic. And the traffic in London is horrific! And where did all the people go? When they are running through the streets, they are empty!! No people! It would have been better as a post-apocalyptic movie like “I am Legend”

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The hero saves the day and kills the terrorist

Just once I want to see a movie where when a helicopter gets shot down and the people inside are not strapped in any type of seat belts and crash together with the flight they are in, they do not walk away with no scratches even. I want a movie where the hero dies trying to fight for something he believes in. I want Crouching Tiger again where even the good guy dies at the end. * no spoiler *

Morgan Freeman in a minor role

2f85345e34a0f110b78b487a4abdcac9_311x0topI do solemnly swear never to watch another Morgan Freeman movie where his face is plastered all over the posters but he does not actually play a major role. It has happened before.

 

Useless and pointless violence

The secret agent literally tortures a captive terrorist in front of the president. Where did all this hatred come from? We don’t have a backstory at all for him with the exception that he had a pregnant wife and he wanted to resign (bad idea in this economy)

Arabs are bad message passed across

We are being told that the bad guy of the movie was protected by multiple governments and he was trading guns. Not actually involved with actual terrorism. And yet he is terminated by a drone without a trial or any type of major conviction. I actually rooted for him.

Massive plot holes left untouched

If you find out that there is a mole in an organization like MI6, you tell your superiors immediately and there will be a court martial done for him to judge him of treason. You don’t confront him solo in a parking lot… where he had 50-50% chance of escape. And WHY did he do it? And how did the bad guys infiltrate all the way into MI6 without being detected? How did they find the mole? Did they convince him to join by trading guns with him? How did the Americans not get into trouble by attacking civilians with a drone? Laughable…

Characters with one-liners

I got really bored seeing everyone’s name and title appear on screen after every line was spoken. And there are some people that never say anything even though you would think they have something to say…. I watched the woman behind MF for the entire movie as I was pleasantly surprised to see a woman in the inner administration circle of the president. Gender equality and all. But she is merely decorative.

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Don’t watch the movie… Only if you want to treat it as a comedy as it’s definitely not an immersive drama.

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