For my birthday I wanted…

boss

Not long ago I was happy to celebrate my birthday – with my friends and family – and I extended an invitation to the place I currently work so we can go out on my treat.
I usually do this in Romania as my friend list is quite small (the number can be counted on one hand) and as their birthdays come around, I get invited out as well on their treat. This is a wonderful way to keep friendships alight and it allows the host of the party to feel happy about sharing their birthday happiness with others. Sharing a meal, sharing a life.
It was my mistake now that I think about it.
I thought that British people were the same.

Last year, I invited my six colleagues out in the town and we had a wonderful time out. They got me a cute cookie monster t-shirt and cake and I treated them to Frank’s Steakhouse.
This year, we were more (8) and It’s still an acceptable number if you think about it.
So I made my invitation again for my birthday – to get the entire department out for a meal at a new Thai place in the middle of Northampton.

All of a sudden, excitement issued from one of the newer colleagues and she invited more people to my party. A guy also decided to bring his girlfriend along. A guy I don’t like showed up as well. There were 10 people. This is only because two of the original team members I invited cancelled out and 2 new ones + 2 more showed up.
I was telling myself – OK, this is not as bad…

Then my boss started berating me on how I did not invite the Account Manager to this party… That I should call him and invite him.
I told him that he might have gone home – and he looked really upset.
Really – I don’t go around planning his birthday party! I don’t go and invite people that I like to his party! I avoided any discussion with him on the matter but I think this should not be done! Am I the only one?!

They beat me to the restaurant and they were already seated by the time I arrived. The only places I could sit were in the corner of the table (the corner usually dedicated for the less important family members at a family dinner).
I sat down and then the party began.
I heard chatter all around me, heard people ordering starters & mains and sides, drinks and beers- almost without a glance at me.
I have never felt so alone and left out at a thing that was supposed to be a celebration in my honour.. They gave me a present – a card signed by all of them, with a small note from each. The guy I didn’t like wrote
“Happy birthday you crazy bitch!”
…. yeah, real classy…
He was like “Oh – did you see my message? It’s funny ’cause you’re such a bitch!”
I didn’t think it was funny.
I replied – “Oh, I knew it was from you – it speaks loads about your character”
Oh – that did not go down well with him! He sulked and tried a retort but it did not come out as he wanted so he decided to just order a bit more…

The food was absolutely amazing! I believe that was the only thing that made the evening bearable!
I had spicy mushroom soup and sea bass. So yummy that I promised myself I will go there again for a meal with my true friends.

For the future – I learned what I need to do:

Do not tell anyone at your work when your birthday is. It is a personal event in your lifetime and you would not want to share it with the wrong people.

Second:

The more you share with people, the more ammunition you give them to hurt you.

I decided the morning after that I do not wish to be in the company of these people next year come.
I’ll start my search for a new place where I can work and hopefully the people would be of better quality and not just sheep.
Boy_cs

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