If Microsoft Built Bikes…

1 – New seats would require everyone to have the same size ass.
2 – We’d all have to switch to Microsoft Petrol(tm).
3 – The oil, charge, petrol, and other warning lights would be replaced by a single “General Protection Bike Fault” warning light.
4 – Sun Motorsystems would make a bike that was solar-powered, twice as reliable, five times as fast, but would only run on 5% of the roads.
5 – You would constantly be pressured to upgrade your bike.
6 – You could only have one person on your bike at a time, unless you bought Bike ‘2000 or Bike NT, but then you’d have to buy more seats.
7 – Occasionally, your bike would just die for no reason, and you’d have to restart it. For some strange reason, you would just accept this as normal.
8 – Every time the lines on the road were repainted, you’d have to buy a new bike.
9 – People would get excited about the new features on Microsoft bikes, ignoring that they had been available on other brands for years

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